I really don't want to talk about my father too much right now. He's doing OK. He got out of the hospital yesterday and seems alright. I spent Easter with him at home which was cool. What WASN'T cool was that he handed me and my brother his legal will after dinner.

Boy, did THAT cheer me up.

OK, I'll talk about dad when I feel brave enough, It's just too sensitive right now.

What I think I'll go over now is Wendyloo.

If you keep up with my guestbook, you'd notice that she left this...."I've been reading your diary today and you seem like you can be a nice guy. We did you act like such a dick?"

Now, I didn't have a clue who the heck this was. Much less, what I did to become a dick. I mean, it could of been anything!

People, if you're gonna' let me know I'm a dick, PLEASE write specifics (as well as take a number and get in line, HA!) because really......

So, like any good "Dick" would do, I decided to get to the bottom of this mystery. I sent out the following email.....

--- "Jon ." wrote:

"Hi Wendyloo.

Thanks for your inquiry in my guestbook. Let's see if I can't help clarify some things for you. Let's see, the question was "I've been reading your diary today and you seem like you can be a nice guy. We (sic) did you act like such a dick?" Unfortunately your incorrect dialog puzzles me as to what it is exactly you're inquiring about. Do you mean "when" did you become such a dick? Or "why" did you act like such a dick? Again, I'm puzzled. I can only assume that I'm a dick because I believe in capital punishment. I'm not sure though, your aforementioned question leaves a lot of holes. There are countless ways I can be a dick. If you'd be so kind as to point out what specifically qualifies me for Dickness, I'd be much obliged.

Thanks again for visiting my diary!

-Genghis Jon

>

Ps

I see you're from New Jersey.

Bruce Springsteen rawks!!!!!"

Then she replied......

"Hey Jon,

Ok, it was meant to be "WHY did you have to be such a dick?" I don't really care about your views on capital punishment. It's what you did to disrupt my life that matters. I suspect you already know what you did but I'll ask you another question. Just what was the point of Oprah's Book Club 1? I'd really like to know.

Wendy"

And then I wrote.....

"Oh, that???

Well it just seemed like the thing to do.

I mean, there was a Oprah Book Club 2, yet no Oprah Book club 1????

That's crazy!

I just felt obigated to fill in the void.

I hardly would put it as "distruptin' one's life."

Just good old fashioned, Oprah Book Humor. I'm sure you've enjoyed it yourself.

Some pretty harty fun going on in there, lemme' tell you....

-Genghis Jon"

ps The Boss Rulz mm/mm/

She didn't write me back.

So, OK. I totally forgot about this. Yes, she is right. I am a dick. Let me fill in the holes.

OK, one day I was checking out various Yahoo! clubs and came across a club called Oprah's book club 2 and thought to myself. "Oprah's book club 2? What about Oprah's book club 1?"

So I done started Oprah's book club 1.

I have to admit, the only purpose was to ruffle some feathers. If there's one thing I can't stand, it's Oprah Winfrey and that big, fat head of hers. She's always losing weight and then lecturing people on how important it is to stay skinny, two months later she's bigger then ever. Hey, if she's suppose to be the queen of self-help, why isn't she lecturing about how important it is to just be yourself, and be happy with who you are? I'll tell you why, because even "The Big O" knows that women aren't shit if they're fat. Nice job, Oprah.

So anyways, when I heard about her stupid book club I went a little mad. I think the whole idea of "Oprah's book club" is just daft.

So that's why I started the club. On her club she had the book of the month as "The House of Sand and Fog" and I had "The Ding Dong Clock".

I went back and forth with that. Under the title read "Better then Oprah's Book Club 2". It's funny because on the directory the clubs are listed next to each other. A few people joined the club and kept ithe maddness alive. A few joined thinking it was the other club, and a few joined who were just weird. I don't put much effort into it, but I do like to stop by once a month or so.

But anyways, it was a joke. If she can't see the humor in that then I feel sorry for her. People really need to lighten the hell up. I'm sure if all I did all day long is sit at home and gab on the computer about Oprah's "Fat Head Club" I might feel a bit tiffy about a mock club. But please. Claiming that I "disrupted her life" is a bit of an overkill, no?

-GJ

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