Cool at last!
Damn, what a crazy weekend.
I decided to start partying again. Friday night I decided that 8 years clean and sober was enough.
So, I hooked up with some buds of mine and went to this wicked party. Everyone there was totally wasted when I got there. Which was cool. People were walking around, trying to hold themselves up. Puking all over the place. A few others were jumping on things, screaming really loud. And a few others were just laying on the floor staring at there hand.
Needless to say, this was one cool fucking shindig!
So, I started off haveing a couple of Heinekens (or 'heineys' as me and my bros call it!)
I started getting a little buzz after my second heiney, and that was sooooooo cool. Then one of my broskis had this wicked idea. He reached in his pocket and pulled out a bowl with some marijuana to smoke.
I just about flipped my top! THAT, my friend....IS SO FUCKING COOL!
So after slapping each other high-fives for about 20 minutes, we started to smoke up the shit. That was REALLY cool. I mean REALLY cool. I know you guys can't understand how cool it was just by reading this. But trust me, if you were there you'd of known.
And if you think THAT was cool (and it was!) check this out! Turns out that the ganja we were endulging in was actually laced with Angel Dust! This must of been my lucky night or something, I couldn't believe how cool this was!
So, then we all started feeling the utter "coolness" of the dust, yo. My brother-from-another-mother, Tony started seeing an army of nazi smurfs coming to attack him. So he grabbed a knife from the kitchen and started to fight back the army. You should of seen him, jumping on the floor trying to stab the nazi smurfs. Then he started to think that the smurfs had crawled into his fingers and were on their way to his brain to take over his body. So, get this man, he starts screaming "you fucking smurfs will never get to my brain!" and then he cut off two of his fucking fingers! Now THAT was cool the the third power, mi amigo!!!! I know a lot of you tight asses out there might think that's a little extreme. Well SCREW YOU! It was mind expanding and stuff!
So, as I was laughing my ass off at Tony for cutting his fingers off, my other bro, Jerry started slapping his body in different places. I heard him mumbling something at first, and then it got louder. Soon he eough he's slapping himself really hard and shouting "get these fucking bugs off of me!!!!" The dude just TOTALLY lost it! I was laughing my nuts off so hard I puked three times! Jerry finally gets hysterical and jumps out the third story window. He's in the hospital right now and has a few broken bones and shit, but he'll be OK. I talked to him today and he's already wanting to know when we're gonna do it again. Right on man. that's a guy with a great attitude. Can you say Kewladelic, baby?
So anyways, I don't remember what else happened that night. People tell me that I was urinating in a shot glass and drank 12 shots. How FUCKING cool is that???? I woke up in a parking lot the next day not knowing how I got there. I walked 10 miles home with an afterglow of pure, euphoric glee.
Damn I'm glad I started partying again. I can't believe all the cool stuff I was missing. Plus, my mind is so much more expanded now. I can really understand music too. It's like being on a whole new level man. So cool......
I was so, so wrong trying to live straight. That shit's for pussies. Do you know how much fun I had puking and slapping high fives with my bros, and expanding our minds and stuff?
That shit is what life is all about. It's so cool to get drunk and stoned. People really do look up to you and you become part of a group. Who the fuck wants to be an individual? That's too hard and not as cool.
Glad I'm not wasting my life anymore.....