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Genghis Jon Interviews Your Punk (Diaryland Survivor 4) Ass! Episode 7, Featuring July!

Genghis Jon- July, you truly bared yourself in this game. You even came from behind to win IC#6. butt in the end bad luck reared it's ugly head, came in the back door, and you were thrown out on your ass. Are you emBARE-ASSed that you got voted off?

July- Frankly it's a boon to be out. And what's better is that finally someone made some ASS jokes. I was beginning to think my mooning everyone was being taken too seriously. There is yeast in PREMIUM crackers. That's funny. If you remember to spay or neuter your pet.

Genghis Jon- You described people's reaction to your success at IC#6 , as "shocked and angry". My experience with the Diaryland Survivor community concludes that they're nothing short of fair, level-headed, intelligent, rationale decision makers -so it must be you. BUTT seriously, you showed great creativity and imagination in your challenges. Why do you think you were targeted?

July- When I said people of course I was really speaking to those that were threatened by it. And when I say that, I mean Kinetix. I admit I was upset that so few people really got all the jokes I mixed in to the shiny objects, bells and whistles. I'm just so happy that the Bush girls are of drinking age, that's all I'm saying. Next up: The Olsen Twins!

Genghis Jon- What's your take on Kinetix walking away from the game?

July- The tell-all was way too long. Generally he should edit himself if he's going to write something that long. It needed good punches along the way to keep one interested, but it was just far too exhausting. Mainly I'm happy I lasted longer than he did. But when I'm shooting clay pigeons, I tend to favor a 16-guage over the 12 gauge.

Genghis Jon- A lot of people have expressed their displeasure in his practice of publishing (what some might perceive as) private Instant Message conversations on his website. What do you think about this practice?

July- There is no such thing as privacy on the web unless that little lock in your browser is closed. And even then, the government is watching. And your boss has one of those surfing tracker things installed on the network server. If you are going to leave carrots out for your guests, you should remember to put them in a little bit of water or they will dry out. However, what I find particularly prudent about his usage was the omission of anything he might have said that would cast him in a bad light. My favorite soda at the moment is Code Red Mountain Dew. Mountain Dew has more caffeine than Jolt cola, I have heard.

Genghis Jon- One of the most staunch critics of the game has been Scourge. I found it wildly fascinating how it appears Scourge's only interest outside of world politics and general news has been (of all things) Diaryland Survivor. I was wondering as a former contestant, what you thought about Scourge's harsh criticism to the game and it's contestants? I'd also like you to give his site a rating between 1 and 10.

July- Did you really find it wildly fascinating? I don't see it as criticism, and perhaps that's why people get so infuriated with it. It's commentary. And I enjoy it now that it's given all it's links titles and stuff. I like to go and hover over the links and see all the comments it has added. As far as sewing a button back on is concerned, the first thing you should do is to remove all the old thread. That way your button will be more flush with the fabric than if you leave the wad there. I cannot accurately rate the site as a whole because I only really read the DS4 bits. As far as that goes, I have to give it a 7. I give it such a high number because the idea behind what scourge is trying for is good. However, the execution of the idea has obviously confused everyone into the wrong assumption as to what it's all about. Also, all the rants are only one page long. They need to be in at least the 5 9 page area in order for me to give it anything above a 7.

Genghis Jon- How has Duran Duran helped in your success/untimely dissmisal from the game?

July- It's amazing you asked that. You must be a mind reader, because when Kinetix crafted his fake alliance thing and assigned everyone numbers, I assigned everyone a duran song that they reminded me of:

Alternamommy: "None of the Above"

Angeline: "Girls On Film" (Night Version)

Chome: "Hungry Like the Wolf"

Gingerbug: "Hold Back the Rain"

july: "The Edge of America/Late Bar"

Kinetix: "Friends of Mine"

Magpie: "Meet El Presidente"

Matt: "Tel Aviv"

Ms-M: "We Need You"

Raw: "Like An Angel"

By the way, if any of the contestants or judges want a CD of these songs, feel free to email me with your address. I'll get around to making one eventually.

(For more on this nonesense, read this.)

Genghis Jon- Why do you want to move to Vermont so bad? Can't you grow dread locks, vote for Nader, and not take showers in Jersey?

July- I'm a closet Phish fan. Oh I'm sorry- does using the term "closet" cross some sort of line? I like to use a Sharpie Ultra-fine marker to write on the walls in the bathroom. Usually I write "I Like Mice - Nice mice nice"

Genghis Jon- You claim to have spent 6 hours on IC#2 . That's a lot of free time on your hands, pal. Ever consider volunteering at your local Meals on Wheelsor something?

July- You don't need to worry about that. It's time I would have spent jerking off while oogling the girls in the Sears catalog anyway. And if you calculate the "twenty minutes per day" in Kinetix's rant, that comes out to a whole lot of minutes HE should have been jerking off instead.

Genghis Jon- Would you kill Kintex if you knew you could get away with it? I'm just curious. I promise not to print this. You can trust me.

July- Absolutely not. You're thinking of other people who take this stuff far more seriously I'm a big Enya fan. If I met Kinetix in real life I would be more likely to try to bring him out to some gay bars.

Genghis Jon- Let's say you're Peter Gabriel , and DS4 is Genesis. I'll play the role of Skip Skippleton -Hotshot reporter for Rolling Stone Magazine. "Mr Gabriel pleasure to meet you! It's not everyday I shake hands with the artist behind such great prom songs. Anyway, my question is what do you think you'll take away from your experience with Genesis?"

July- Are you Stuttering John from the Howard Stern show? Well, when I left Genesis, I took Phil's drumsticks with me. He's so stupid that when he couldn't find them he decided that maybe he should sing instead since the drums were unplayable. You should come to WOMAD sometime. And sign the Amnesty International list on your way out, will you?

Genghis Jon- No. You made it public that you voted for Kintex to be ousted. A lot of people dodge this question but I'll ask anyways. Who else did you vote for?

July- Correction: I wasn't the first to make that fact public. I don't think anyone dodges the question as much as thinks to themselves "why bother talking about it?" Besides, I don't really remember. I voted against Magpie because Kinetix told me to, though. Hey- it was either her or me. Sorry Magpie- I guess we both got hosed by that one.

Genghis Jon- Is there a person you're rooting for to win?

July- I'm glad you asked, because yes there is!

Genghis Jon- Who do you think will win, and why?

July- I won. Because I am SCHIZOID MAN! Hear me ROAR!

Genghis Jon- Well it's been interesting to say the least. Anyone can tell that you put a lot of effort into this game, and for that you should be commended. It's gotta be a little disappointing walking away from this not the winner. Anyways, I want you to think for a bit about everything you've been though in this game, good and bad, and make a final statement to everyone about how you feel about them, and the game.

July- I didn't enter this thing to win. I entered it to have a little fun and fuck around a bit to while away the hours at work. As far as the implied intent of this question, I have no dirt to scatter around. I will continue to read some of the journals I have found here, others I will not. I honestly don't hate anyone, and that includes Kinetix. I know I've busted on him in this interview, but that's just for fun and because he asked for it. As for Gingerbug, I don't hate her either. The only reason why I became hostile to her was because of her openly admitting that she voted for me because of my association with the EVIL MESSAGE BOARD- despite being only one of many who post there. However, Telutci is indeed the antichrist. I have pictures.

Genghis Jon- One last question -the girls want me to ask you if you're really hung like a pony? Any chance you might post a pic of yourself turned around?

July- "the girls" huh? Why don't you just admit that it's your own curiosity? If you really want a picture of me turned around, I'm sure we can work something out. Do you have paypal?

Genghis Jon- No, but I'll get it! I want to see if you dread lock them pubes.

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