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Freedom Fries

My new favorite saying lately is "Let's Roll."

Granted, it's been a good year and a half since the phrase was made popular by our president. I think he's even sick of hearing it now- most people are.

But what surprises me the most is how addictive it gets once you start saying it regularly. I've been using the term liberally for maybe 2 months now and I don't think I could stop without some sort of therapy.

It started off innocent enough. Once, me and some friends were marching to our car, on our way to a bar when I yelled out "Let's Roll!"

Everyone laughed, it was a good time. I wish I just stopped there, but it was already too late.

The next day when me and my roommate went to get coffee, I grabbed my keys and said "Let's Roll." He offered a polite smile, but clearly thought the joke to be over.

When we got to the coffee place, I ordered a small French Vanilla coffee, and a blueberry bagel. The lady explained that they were all out of blueberry, and offered strawberry instead.

"Sure" I said. "Let's roll."

From then on, things in my life started to change slowly. I couldn't get out of bed in the morning without saying "Let's Roll."

I filled up an entire page, doodling the phrase "Let's Roll" over and over again while at work.

I even used it in front of my ma'. MY OWN MA', MAN! I fucking used it as a closing statement.

"OK, ma I gotta roll..."

But the lowest point in my "Let's Roll!" career is when I made the mistake of saying it in front of my brother. Jason had 10 years in the military, and is now a cop. He's very susceptible to these sort of catch phrases.

Ever since I made the mistake of sharing my new war cry with him, he's taken it as a bonding experience between him and I. He even invented his own version, just for me. "Let's Roll, Bro!"

I never meant for this to happen. This was suppose to be a joke! Now look where I brought it to. "Let's Roll, Bro!" Fucking shit. I seriously need to take a look at the long term consequences the next time I want to start something dumb like this.


I hate my survey page so much. I did such a terrible job at the questions it's not even funny. What's more, it's become a breeding ground for people who've never read my diary to voice their stupid opinions about it.

Seriously, they'll go through 9 questions telling me how much I suck, and then they'll get to a question asking them what's their favorite entry, to which they'll reply "I haven't read any."

I swear to God, I'm like the Statue of Liberty for retards.


Oh, big news! French fries aren't called french fries anymore. They're called Freedom Fries.

It seems some Americans are so mad at the French that they were forced to take some sort of action. In this case, removing their likeliness from these potato goodness.

HA! Take that you Frog bastards! Wanna stand in our way over a war, do ya? Well, how about I shove a pound of Freedom Fries up your ass! That oughta' knock some sense into you. Fucking cheese eating, Jerry Lewis loving assholes!

I'm getting off track here, I wanted to talk more about these mysterious Freedom Fries. I mean, other than the fact that they're no longer French, what do they do to promote freedom? And if they do promote freedom, why not just drop some Freedom Fries all over Iraq? Maybe sprinkle a little over Iran, and North Korea. Seems like a great idea to me. We'll call it "Operation; Supersize" or perhaps "Operation; McDemocracy"

Let's roll!


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