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Tommy, can you hear me? Good. Don't tell your parents. Man, what are we gonna' do with that Pete Townshend? Looking at kiddie porn for research? He's writing a book? What the fuck kind of book is he writing? Sicko. And if anyone is surprised by this behavior, I ask that you take a close read to the lyrics of Pete's song "Rough Boys" that I painstakingly took the liberty to produce for you... Tough boys Running the streets Come a little closer Rough toys Under the sheets Nobody knows here Rough boys Come over here I wanna bite and kiss you I wanna see what I can find Tough kids Take a bottle of wine When your deal is broken Ten quid She's so easy to blind Not a word is spoken Rough boys Don't walk away I'm still pretty blissed here Tough boys I'm gonna carry you home You got pretty pissed dear Gonna get inside you Gonna get inside your bitter mind Rough boys Don't walk away I wanna buy your leather Make noise Try and talk me away We can't be seen together Tough kids What can I do? I'm so pale and weedy Rough fits In my Hush Puppy shoes But I'm still pleadin Tough boys Running the streets Come a little closer Rough toys Under the sheets Nobody knows her Rough boys Come over here I wanna bite and kiss you I wanna see what I can find Hmmm, given a closer look you're oblidged to believe that the song is not about a high school football match as previously thought. Nope. It's more like the NAMBLA National Anthem. See, the problem was that we were so hung up on waiting for Michael Jackson to get caught doing something like this, that we totally overlooked Pete Townshend. The guy has been dropping hints for years! YEARS!!!! Just look at the songs he's written... "The Kids Are Alright" Yeah, I bet they were.... "Tommy" That deaf, dumb, blind kid- Sure gives a mean handjob. "Magic Bus" All aboard to Pete's Palace of Pleasure! "Who Are You" I'm an underage, naked boy on the internet. "Pinball Wizard" Ball? As in testicle? "I'm A Boy" Good God! "I Can See For Miles" He means naked boys from miles away on the internet. "I Can't Explain" Is what he was planning on telling the police when he got caught. "Happy Jack" OY Vey! Don't even make me interpret this one. ----------------------------------- Also in the news..... From the "isn't that ironic" section. Maurice Gibbons, bass player/keyboardist for the band, The Bee Gees. Most famous for the song "Staying Alive".......is dead. Maurice is the one on the right showing off his booty. ----------------------------------- My friend Sean announced that he was going on a cruise. I asked him when he was coming back. He said "Martin Luther King's day" to which I replied...BACK IN BLACK!!!! -----------------------------------
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