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If I Eat Too Much Hamas I Will Get Fatah

If I were a Palestinian I'd definately be a member of the Hamas Party, which surprises some of my closest friends. They're always like "Really? I always thought of you as a Fatah!" But, no. I'd be Hamas if I were Palestinian, definately.

The some of my Jewish friends gets all pissed off at how I wouldn't recognize the existence of Israel, and how I wouldn't disband the military wing once we became a prominet political power, but like what-ever. That would be like totally gay.

Plus once you join a club you should really stick with it, you know? No matter what. Like that time when I was a Boy Scout and my Scout Master said while on a camping trip that instead of being called the Boy Scouts we would now be called the 'Naked Wrestling Monkeys'.

Sure I could of been a jerk about it and left the Monkeys, but then everybody would of thought of me as a quiter, and you should never be a quiter. Even when your Scout Master tells you to stick a phony tail up your butt and wrestle him.

But anyways, back to the important political discusion we were having. To me, Hamas sounds like humus. And anybody who knows me will tell you that I love a good humus sandwich.

And who came up with the name Fatah?

To my Palestinian readers out there, I know you're new to the political process so I just want to offer you some advice. In order to become a sucessful political party you have to have a name people can get behind. Fatah sounds like "fat ass". It isn't gonna' work, women won't join.

You need a name that whets the appitite, like the Hamas/humus thing? That's the right idea.That's cool. Check this out, how about the Heeseburger Party? Cool huh?

An added poke of course is Orthodox Jews cannot eat cheeseburgers because they're not kosher....just like Heeseburger!


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