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Genghis Jon Interviews Your Punk Ass! Episode XI Featuring Disco The Kid!!!!!

Finding Disco The Kid's diary is kinda like if you were a hooker and you found a $100 bill on the sidewalk. You know? You get that "that's one less butt pounding I'll have to give out" feeling. I'm not sure what that means, but it takes a magic man to make me feel that way, folks. Anyways, I began a repoire with Sir Disco and we hit it off famously. Despite his better judgment, he agreed to a GJ interview. In a time when the news won't stop reporting about babies who are joined at the head, I think a Disco interview is refreshing distraction to say the least. So at the risk of having the Mispell-o-thon 2002, I give you my interview with Disco the Kid............

Genghis Jon -First question. You're a happily married man, so what's the point in being in a band? And don't feed me none of that "I love music" crap. I just ate.

Disco The Kid -You see right through me don't you? The truth is, I am in a band because my drummer lets me sign his tits and my keyboardist gives great hand jobs! Seriously, it's a fantastic ego boost. Now and then I will take one for the team, but usually I only show up at practice when Mike is wearing his "special pearl thong." Welcome Home Mike!

Genghis Jon -I saw a few pictures of ya. You're a very Irish looking fellow. Question. How fearful are you that someone might find your Lucky Charms?

Disco The Kid -I saw a picture of you too Jon, I'm wondering where you hide the Frankenberry?

Genghis Jon -Which is your favorite name for a metal band out of the three. Slautersnot, Caked in Crap, or Cuppa Joe's Kitties?

Disco The Kid -Although I have every album that "Cuppa Joe's Kitties" ever put out, I have to go with "Caked In Crap." That is a fantastic name for any band.

Genghis Jon -Sometimes I picture myself being made love to as a woman. Me in a satin nighty. Big strong arms around me. Penetrated deeply. How'd you get your user-name?

Disco The Kid -My user name was an extension of the journal name, which is " The Earthbound Disco Ball." I came up with the journal name as sort of a metaphor for writer's block. I thought of Disco The Kid right after that. Also, stop hitting on me fucker!

Genghis Jon -You've referred to someone as a nipple, you hate potheads, your favorite Canadian is Leonard Cohen, you play in a band, and you use sarcasm like an art form. You know, you remind me of someone...

Disco The Kid -Probably someone French. The truth is I'm really Halle Barry.

Genghis Jon -You once suggested that we replace the Mexicans with the Swiss. Have you thought about the implications this might have on the menu at Taco Bell Mr. Knowitall?

Disco The Kid -I haven't really given the matter much thought, but now that you mention it I am sure that the work uniform would be a whole lot sexier.

Genghis Jon -Have you ever made love to your wife with your clown costume on? Remember, if you're lying I'll know.

Disco The Kid -Is this your idea of satire? Are you trying to be funny? Um, yes.

Genghis Jon -What do you think would happen if someone passed the dutchie on the RIGHT hand side?

Disco The Kid -Your high would arrive counter clockwise?

Genghis Jon -Right now I'm watching Joni Mitchell do some cocktail jazz version of her song "Woodstock" Try to talk me from killing myself.

Disco The Kid -I begged you not to rent that Lillith Fair documentary but nooooooo someone just had to get his ya-yas out watching Fiona Apple didn't they?

Genghis Jon -Oh, now I'm watching Hanoi Rocks do a cover of a CCR song. I'M GONNA' DO IT MAN!!!!!!!!!!!

Disco The Kid -Some twisted part of me really liked that band. It was probably the same part of me that hates myself.

Genghis Jon -Wouldn't a nice big bowl of mayonnaise hit the spot right about now?

Disco The Kid -Not even remotely.

Genghis Jon -I have a theory on why women use to scream at Beatles shows. I believe they were screaming in horror at the one freak playing with his left hand. What do you think?

Disco The Kid -I've heard about your theory on left-handed people and I have to tell you that I am positive that you are in fact retarded.

Genghis Jon -Seriously though. He'd cup my luscious bosoms. Kiss my womanly lips with his firm mouth. I'd moan in ecstasy as I feel myself dampen. Do you think layouts are important?

Disco The Kid -It sounds like you have your layout already figured out Jon.

Genghis Jon -Disco, you are a huge talent and I'm happy that you took the time to get your punk ass interviewed. Please say some parting words for our cyber-audience.

Disco The Kid -Thank you so much for having me Jon, and I think I speak for everyone reading this when I tell you that this interview has taught no one anything about either of us. Good show!

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