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Four Votes

So my landlords are painting the house this week. The first step to that is to powerwash it. I know that because I was awaken at 6:30 this morning by getting powerwashed in my bed. You see, the FUCKING landlord was blindly washing the house with all the windows open. You know, kinda' like only a fucking asshole would?

I was so mad I just stuck my head out the window and stared at him. He apologized and I went back to bed. I overheard him say to his partner something about at least I didn't need to take a shower this morning.

OK, that was kinda' funny.


Ever just wake up one morning and think about someone from your past? Well today I woke up thinking about heroin. Everytime I'm basicly doing well, and start to feel good about myself I get an urge to call her. It's like I've got some implant in my brain that overides every possitive thought I have, and transfers my attention towards her.

Anyways, here's how I handle these situations. I send a joke email out to a bunch of people. One of which, is her. She can respond one of two ways, either way I'm covered. First- she could respond friendly, and I'll admit that the email was "my olive branch." Please come back into my life my dear, my emotions await your carnage.

Or..she can write "why are you writing me?" and I can say "FUCK YOU! I put your name on by accident. Eat my ass!!!"

Or she could just not respond at all, which it seems like she's doing.

Hoh' boy. Don't do heroin kids.


And in the "I'm too good for Diaryland" news. Genghis Jon has located a rare update from The Most Dangerous Man To Ever Keep A Diary. Warning! Those of you with short attention spans (i.e. Those amongst us that have complained to me about "boring political entries") might wanna' pass on the link. Jonas Cord uses some mighty bigs words, with very few jokes about penises.


Also, my "Who's your favorite interview" survey is completely out of control. It appears now that Fade In had taken the lead at 2,520. Blowing away the past leader TV Zero who now lays wounded and bleeding at 1,520. Coming in third is the great Uncle Bob at 493. He's probably the only non-cheater out of the lot. Instead, he's got his army to come in here and cheat for him. That's loyalty, baby! In a respectable forth, representing "Girl Power" at 444 is Ladee Leroy. You would think she'd be doing much better seeing that she's the one that figured out you can cheat. At a distant fifth is Mista' Disco boasting 61 votes. Shit, Leeroy can get that in 3 minutes dude! Mucho behind Disco in sixth place is Guildenstern who at a humble 19, shows off his humility. When asked why he has such a low number of votes, he stated that he just wanted to be on top of...Erato, whom at seventh place and only 9 votes shows that because her sex life is so much more magnificant than the people above her, she hasn't the time to cheat on the survey. Underneath her in eighth place is Jonas Cord, who is obviously banging Erato. In nineth place is Rocker-Snarl at nine votes. There is no reason for this. And last, but not least is the imfamous "nice guy" Cuppa Joe who has a total of four votes. Four. This is what happens when you conscience forbids you from cheating. Four votes, ladies and gentlemen.



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