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Oh, Fucking Canada....

Nearly a year ago liberals from the left-coast all the way to Yankee New England took the news of another four years of George W Bush with disdain and panic.

Let's face it, the first four years were brutal on them and the issues they hold dear. For instance that "No war without at least a good reason" thing they're always whining about. That was one of the first things President Bush  knocked out. The environment? Stated publicly that he hasn't seen concrete proof that it exists. Healthcare for all Americans? Scolded them as "unpatriotic" for thinking of such things during a time of war.

Yes, things were bad for liberals in this coutry, no doubt. George Bush was killer his first four years in office and that was facing the prospect of re-election. Now getting elected for the second time he will never have to run for office the rest of his life. He's free. In his speech given after John Kerry's asswhippin', he said "I earned capital in the campaign, political capital, and now I intend to spend it."

Translated that means "It's Liberal Hunting Season, bitch!"

What's a Bleeding Heart to do?

What many of them did was move to a place they were wanted. A place that shared their love of nature, and the environment. A place that took care of their old and sick. A place stood up to George Bush when he attacted Iraq. A place that even tolerates the French.

"Sucre bleu!"

I'm talking about none other than Mars.

Just kidding, I'm talking about none other than Canada.

Ahh, Canada. Canada that has always been there for the sane American when our government has gone off it's rocker. Canada has always been there to welcome our fleeing with open arms into it's liberal bosom.

That is...until now.

Wholesome Family Values invade Canada

Stephen Harper of the Conservative Party was elected the first non-liberal pot smoking dirty hippie as Prime Minister.

What does this mean for Canada? Well, a few things.

First, no more of this...

Not anymore, motherfucker!

Liberals, your worst fear has come true.

"Conservative governmental policies make my skin burn, noooooooooo!!!!!"

It's all Jesusland now. There's no place to run, there's no place to hide, there's no place to go.

"Where do we go, where do we go now, where do we go?"

Prime Minister Martin, as a conservative has a huge task ahead of him. Mainly for Canada to stop being seen a little wimpy country. To be able to stand on it's own away from America's shadow. For the people of Canada to stop being seen as cowering, and unable to stand up for themselves.

But this goes beyond the French.

"Hey, fuck you!"

This is about a man with a dream. A Dream to unite North America into a conservative bastion of might and anti-abortionism.

It's gonna' take a lot of fucking ice cream to cheer Michael Moore up after this.


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