Genghis Jon Interviews Your Punk (Diaryland Survivor 4) Ass! Episode 9, Featuring Raw Voice!
Hi, remember me?
Sorry there's been such a lack in updates. Blame my employer. See, I just read a post informing us employees that they purchased some software that can and will spy on EVERYTHING we do on our computers. Even emails I send thru web based programs can be read. All I need is for them to find my fucking diary. That would really impress them. So all I can say is that I'll try to update the best I can on evenings and weekends, which, as you can imagine, is where my schedule is quite full.
You see, most evenings I'm involved donating time to the Burn The Rainforest Foundation.
And weekends, of course I'm busy offering cigarettes to children at the park, so......
Anyways, here's my interview with someone called Raw Voice or Raw Fish or something. She was kicked off Diaryland Survivor about a trillion years ago. I would of done her sooner, but them kids aren't gonna learn to smoke on their own, you know?
Genghis Jon- Those heartless bastards threw you out of the game right near Christmas! How hot will the fire be where the judges will be spending eternity?
Raw-Voice- considering heaven for this game is a barcalounger in front of some insipid talk show sitcom brainless blather, i'd have to excuse the judges from any type of hellfire and damnation. i mean, c'mon, ain't it bad enough already?
Genghis Jon- Hey, I see that you won some reward challenge Good for you! You go girl!
Raw-Voice- yup, sure did. however i conveniently forgot that trusty lil somethin' when ordering the slew of PLEASE VOTE FOR ME gifts off amazon. oh, wait! that wasn't me...!
Genghis Jon- In said reward challenge, you wrote that you were once in love with the man you're with now's cousin. You also wrote that you adopted the child of his other cousin. I don't know how to ask this, so I'll just come right out. Are these your cousins as well?
Raw-Voice- no, they aren't my cousins, but they do have a cousin who's a regular on Springer. his name's tim and he's always in some sort of big gay triangle. that being said, they are my son's cousins, but my son is just my nephew, therefore negating any cousinal attachment i might have had.
Genghis Jon- Now that you're not playing Diaryland Survivor anymore, how does it feel to have sex again?
Raw-Voice- uh, you don't follow well, do you? i never forego sex.
Genghis Jon- Blah, blah, blah Loudwoman. Blah, blah, blah, Gingerbug. Blah, blah, blah Kinetex.
Raw-Voice- batty, tacky, and catty.
Genghis Jon- Diaryland Survivor aside, do you think you have what it takes to be number one?
Raw-Voice- "I.. am.. number one - no matter if you like it / Here take it sit down and write it / I.. am.. number one / Hey hey hey hey hey hey - now let me ask you man / What does it take to be number one? / Two is not a winner and three nobody remembers (hey) / What does it take to be number one? / Hey hey hey hey.."
Genghis Jon- This was terrible. What were you thinking?
Raw-Voice- i don't know off hand which one that is, but if it's the one where you had to be in a tv show, yeah it fucking sucked. i totally should have been voted out. well, me or chrome. we both blew that one. but, hey, i watch three television shows total, what do you want from me?
Genghis Jon- Somebody told me that you think everyone that was dismissed ahead of you as "filthy white-cracker punk bitches that eat dead babies." Why would you say that?
Raw-Voice- it's cause i'm mexican right?
Genghis Jon-Don't you think Diaryland Survivor should have gotten the 80's band Survivor to kick off the contest or something? You know, sing a little "Eye of the Tiger" or something?
Would it kill them to add a touch of class?
Raw-Voice- class has nothing to do with this game.
Genghis Jon-As a spectator, DS4 seems pretty involving. I'd guess that you'd have to sacrifice a big chunk of your personal time to be an involved competitor. After putting in all this time away from your family, feeling a little frustrated is extremely understandible. Which leads me to my question- What ever happened to Pudding Pops? Why don't they bring them back?
Raw-Voice- obviously you aren't employed by the government. all you noble taxpayers funded my experience in diaryland survivor 4. i thank you for that. and, thanks much for keeping me from ever investing my "personal" time in this game. work time is much better.
Genghis Jon- Flip a coin, who's gonna win DS4?
Raw-Voice- Angeline has to win. matt might cause he's floated by this far, but if talent-wise, angeline has it in the bag. matt's nice, but the talent is a big black hole.
Genghis Jon- Well, you played well. And there are like 7 or 8 other people that suck more than you (or as you'd say are "filthy white-cracker punk bitches that eat dead babies") What would you like to say to your former fellow contestants.
Raw-Voice- some of you should work on your anger management, some of you need to work on your paranoia, others of you show signs of schizophrenic affected - you all need help. also, if you joined an alliance you should have been true to it. you'd have gotten a lot further. other than that, i had fun - thanks for playing.