Another one
Band out of Hartford needs guitar player pronto! Just signed a 5 record deal with Sony Music Corp. Must be willing to tour!!!!! Will be leaving for European tour in early January, after that we will be touring North America and beyond. We expect to be doing very little other than touring in 2002/2003 so if you have doubts about that please don't waste our time. Hoping to have spot filled by early Nov. Our songs are NOT that difficult, if you know your way around the guitar, that's good enough. Not looking for Steve Vai. We're more interested in someone that can handle the touring life. Our album is already finished, you'll be coming on doing videos (to be shot in December) touring, playing festivals, ect. If you even have the slightest doubt, PLEASE, don't respond. All others email me ASAP and we'll talk.
-From: "Alex
hey
i'm 18 years old guitar player from West HArtford. what kind of music u guys play?
my influences are Nirvana, Doors, Black Sabbath, Deep Purple , Gun's N roses
i don't have a problem with touring so let me know
later
-From: Genghis Jon
Sorry I didn't get back to you sooner Alex.
I was in LA this weekend at Sony headquarters. We're a heavy band along the lines of Bloody Fetus, Christian Death, The Eye Eaters, Anal Cunt, and anything on TRL. I'm also big on every band you mentioned. We need a guitar player FAST, so if you're really interested, let me know.
I have some questions for you before I set up an audition.
Dave.
-From: Alex
hey
I might be interested here although i don't know any of the bands u mentioned.
anyway let me know how u wanna do it, make an audition or something
later
-From: Genghis Jon
Well Alex, you're taking this a little bit more relaxed than I'd hoped. I just spoke to my lawyer while in LA and he predicted that I'll see my first million by this time next year. And so will the other members of this band.
I could care less if you like, or heard of any of the bands I mentioned.
I want someone that will play the songs, come on tour, and be a rock star.
Not a bad deal. If you're still interested, let me know and I'll ask you a few questions before we set up an iterview. If not, have a great life...
Dave
From: "Alex
i'm defianetly interested
Alex
-From: Genghis Jon
Cool, glad to hear it.
Here are some things I need to know before I even meet you. 1) are you OK going on long tours. Meaning you won't see your family and friends for months on end. 2) are you a hard worker. 3) what are you willing to do? Will you wear a dress? Will you do a publicity stunt faking your own death? Will you pretend that you're French, and talk with a french accent? Pretty much, will you do whatever the band, and/or Sony will ask of you? Please let me know ASAP.
Dave
-From: "Alex
hey I can handle tours
I can't say I'm a hard worker but when it comes to music I 'm serious and dedicated. Wearing a dresses and shit like that don't bother me, I'm prety much open for anything.
-From: Genghis Jon
I'm afraid it may have to go way beyond wearing a dress.
Sony is asking us to pretend that we're supporting the taliban.
Their idea is for us to be a bunch of cross-dressers, that have a fetish about being suppressed women in Afghanastan.
We are going to have to speak out against the USA and in support the Taliban.
They also want us to take responsibility for mailing all the anthrax.
Sony has even asked us to go to Afghanastan, dressed like Afghani women, and give a concert in support of Osama bin Ladin.
Now, Sony has assured me that if we don't do this then we don't have any deal. They think the publicity this will bring us will make us the most famous band (if not the most hated) in the world.
We agreed to this.
I know this is WAY crazy, but that's the gig.
Let me know if you can do this and I'll have someone from Sony get in contact with you.
Dave
-From: "Alex"
holy fucking shit thats pretty crazy. i don't know if i want to go to afghanistan. would we at least wait until the war is over
-From: Genghis Jon
Alex my friend, going to Afghanistan is a small price to pay for the life we will be given. Most bands you know had to do the simular things in order to get signed. For instance, The Goo Goo Dolls had to participate in an all male orgy with the Japanese executives at their record company. Bon Jovi had to let their lawyer sleep with all of their girlfriends. David Bowie had to eat his own filth, do you understand what I'm saying Alex???? This is the big leagues and we can't fuck around.
-From: "Alex"
dude, no way am I going to Afghanastan and say that i sent out anthrax. i want to be in ur band but your nuts
-From: Genghis Jon
You're right, that was stupid. How about we just go to Indonesia and support child labor?
-From: "Alex"
no! fuck off!
-From: Genghis Jon
OK, OK.... don't get so upset. Let's just go to West Texas and brag about how us yankees won the war....
**No response
Comments?
