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Stag

So I picked out a new color for my background. I was just sick of having this place look like goth central. I felt like sacrificing a baby everytime I came here.

I know it looks a little retarded, but I'm a little retarded, so it represents nicely.

Anyways, I need to talk about this weekend.

This Saturday we'll be having my brother's stag.

(Jason, my brother is on the left. Genghis Jon is on your right.)

Honestly, I'm preparing to have a shitty time.

Me and my brother do NOT get along.

We never have.

My brother is just the most egotistical, rudest, jerk you'd ever want to meet.

And it's been 10x's worse since the state of Connecticut gave him a badge and a gun.

The last time I saw my brother was maybe a week and a half ago when I ran into him over my dad's house.

I was leaving and he just got there, I got out of my car and walked towards him, saying something along the lines of "Hey, haven't seen you in awhile man, how are ya?"

Jason ignored me, looked over my shoulder at my car and said "get your emissions done, it's two years old!"

I replied with the classic "fuuuuuuuck you."

God, it feels good saying that to a cop and not having a Rodney King pulled on ya.

So anyways, my Saturday will be spent with my brother, and about 200 like minded, meatballheads.

I met lots of Jason's friends, and they are all exactly the same. Saturday's going to be like Attack of the Clones.

I don't even have the heart to drag my friends there. I mean, when I tell them about it I say, "Hey, my brother is having a stag. You don't have to go if you don't want to. I wouldn't go if I had a choice. There's going to be 200 assholes there....."

Even with such a warning, I've still secured 4 or 5 of my friends coming. Thank God too. I can see my big mouth getting me the shit kicked out of by 200 drunken cops.

No girls at this stag either, because my brother's nuts are held in a jar, that are in possesion of his fiance.

I actualy heard him say to her "I don't even want strippers there..."

Lying fucking homo.

In lieu of horny wet sluts dancing, we're going to have poker.

I'm not too shabby of a poker player. I do believe I might kick a little ass there. And along with my magical powers of sobriety, I do believe the odds are stacked in my favor.

Either way. I'm going to get my ass beaten by 200 cops.

I leave everything to TV Zero if I don't return.

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