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John Wayne is NOT Dead

You know I can go on and on about the political elections that are dominating Americans lives right now. I started to write maybe 3 or 4 entries about Bush, and the debates, and yada-yada... Everyone is so saturated by it all why do you want to hear it from me.
I started a political interview with Pork Tornando that I think he lost interest in doing. He did agree to do it but that was before he requested a link to my site.
Anyways, I want to speak to the men. Or what's ever left of our once dominate sex.
The devolution of the male has fallen at a staggering rate in the last few decades. At the beginning of time our kind would club a female over the head and drag her back to our cave. We knew even at that point in history that women were not only were woman nessasary to plant our seed, they were a good source of milk as well.
These days, despite our insticts to do so, these practices are banned by law thanks to weak politicials who's wives hold out sex on them unless they pass such laws. There for the modern male has resorted to all kinds of degrading rituals in order to position themselves in getting the slightest chance of getting laid.
These rituals include dressing like a girl, smelling like a girl, acting like a girl. Girls literally go from playing dress up with Barbie to playing dress up with Harvy.
Don't believe me? Let me give you an example of what an ideal man looked like just a few decades ago.

Nothing made women want to spread their legs more than John Wayne. And he did it by being a man. A real man. A man that rode horses and carried guns. Fought for the USA and drank whiskey. God love him.
And now that the Duke is gone, who's taken his place? What turns a girl to jelly and has the power to make her do anything he want?

Justin Fucking Timberlake. Any dads out there? This is what your boy watches on TV and thinks he needs to emulate. It's a man's world? I don't fucking think so....

Don't you wish there was just one real man out there? Someone we could all look up to and be proud. Even if it isn't us, wouldn't it just ease your mind knowing that while you're trimming your prubes there's one guy out there that can be successful in life just being an unappologetic man?
Well there is such a man. A man I have witnessed with my own eyes. A man they will question his existance in 100 years times for his story is that unbelievable.
His name is Ed, and he is the last free man. It is my honor to tell his story.
About 8 years ago I was a co-worker with Ed. Ed had yet to claim his majestic status at that time, so I refrained from throwing myself at his feet whenever he was in my presence.
Anyways, Ed had a girlfriend that worked there too who's name was Paula. The two of them have been dating for about 4 years at that time. One day another co-worker of ours named Janna moved in with them. Nothing particularly odd about that as it was common for us all being in our early to mid 20's making minimun pay to do.
that is until it was announced at a party by Ed that the union of Ed and Paula, was now the union of Ed, Paula, and Janna.
Yes, polygamists. Trading in the full size bed for a California King.
In interest of full disclosure I should note that all three were on the heavy side, so put away your dicks. This isn't something you'd see in a porn movie outside of the fetish section. But in my opinion that doesn't matter and here's why.
When you watch porn 75% is just that Girl, Girl, Guy. A single man watches around 4,675,678,657 porn videos a year from the time he's 12 until the day he dies. With the expected life average growing higher and higher each year that adds up to a lot of porn.
And despite the honorary PHD men have in threesomes, most of us sadly never experience the event itself.
Those that have tasted Nirvana did so with the help of so much alcohol and cocaine that they barley remember what happened.
What makes Ed so execptional in all this is that he not only accomplished every man's life goal, he was able to sustain the "relationship" until this day.
That's right motherfucker, eight solid years of Ed Sandwiches for dinner every gawdamn night of the week.
I happened to run into someone who knew the Eddie and the Lust Twins since the old days. They moved up to Vermont and I haven't heard from them in many years.
I couldn't believe it when I was told that they're all still together. I mean, what is this guy an arab prince of something? Eight years?
Oh, but wait, there's more.
As if Ed hasn't proven himself as the manliest man alive, he just sealed the deal by planting his seed.
That's right, Ed is a dad. And baby has two mommies. How's that for variety?
And guess what? the chick he knocked up wasn't even the broad he was originally with? He knocked up Janna! That dog. It's like he's telling us underlings "I can impregnate whomever I shall choose." Talk about superheroes.
Upon asking what they were doing for work I found out Janna was a teacher, Paula was a librarian, and Ed? Stay at home dad. No job. His woman work. He stays home. No job.
In some bar in heaven, John Wayne looks down on Ed and smiles knowing that there is a glimer of hope that has not died with him. He then goes back to shooting some Injuns'.


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